How To Get Him To Do That Honey-Do List

In Proverbs 25:24 it states, “It’s better to live in a corner of the roof than in a house shared with a contentious women.”

Yikes!

I heard footsteps on the roof.

Oh no! This verse in Proverbs came to mind immediately. I hadn’t been that bad, had I? I looked out into the yard and I saw a ladder. Yup, it was confirmed, my husband was on the roof! What was he doing up there? If he wanted to get away from me I would have gladly gone to the salon or for a cup of coffee!

Men, do you ever feel like you need a reprieve from your wife?

I know my husband does sometimes. He’ll ask, “Can we just be quiet, please?” Yup! I can do that! Or he’ll send signals he wants to be left alone. I’m happy to do so. Hey, I’ve got my girlfriends I can call!

Ladies, do you ever feel like you need more attention from your man?

Do you want to know how to get it?

Ready?

Leave him alone. What?! Yes, leave him alone. Give him some space. When he knows he can get space, he will want it less and less. And more importantly, when you appreciate him, and dote on him, he’ll want to be around you more often. Perpetually getting on him to do things will only cause him to want to keep away from you.

So, if that’s the case, how in the world do we get that Honey-Do list done? Before we move on to crossing off the tasks on your list, wouldn’t you agree that a harmonious and happy marriage is better than getting any list completed? Amen?

I’m going to repeat that:

A happy and harmonious marriage is better than getting tasks crossed off your list.

But we all know sometimes we like a strong, capable, man to help us out from time to time. Plus, it’s just nice to have help around the house. Agreed?

Okay, try this:

The next time you need something from your husband, plainly ask. Don’t demand, just ask. Then, wait with no expectation. When he gets around to number one on your Honey-Do list thank him, give him a big hug and a kiss, and praise his work. Even if he emptied the trash. “Thank you,” hug, kiss, “I appreciate your help, you really made my day easier! You’re the best husband ever!” Never criticize or complain about the job he did. That’s a surefire way to stop the list crossing off process.

There was a time when my kids were preteens and roughhousing. You know where this is going! The end result was a big hole in my living room wall! It was awhile before my husband could get around to fixing it. I waited. But truthfully, the hole felt like a hole in my heart. Our home means a great deal to us ladies, true?

Then one glorious morning I awoke to a fixed wall. He had stayed up all night fixing it for me! I sobbed with tears of gratefulness, thanking him over and over. Through the years, projects around the house became his idea when he learned how important our home was to me. Slowly, all the fix-it projects have been getting done, as he has time and resources.

And that day he was on our roof?

Hearing the footsteps and looking at the ladder, I suddenly remembered him saying something about a vent that needed to be opened up earlier that morning. Whew! But that doesn’t mean that I can’t be contentious at times. I definitely can hold that title for longer than I would like to admit. So. I. Won’t.

Don’t allow your marriage to suffer because of unfinished projects or tasks.

Ask…wait…thank…praise…be kind…

And if that doesn’t work, give him some fun in the bedroom.

Until next time, love one another.

Fondly,

Lu

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3 thoughts on “How To Get Him To Do That Honey-Do List

  1. I’m assuming you haven’t been married very long? Not to sound rude, but unless you’ve lived in a construction zone for the past two years like I have with unfinished projects at every turn, you cannot possibly assume this will work within a marriage as a general rule. Your marriage perhaps (for awhile at least), although not most. Believe me sister, I have gone from politely asking and subservience like you, all the way to coming home with the material needed where our garage cannot hold anymore and here it sits all this time. What do you suggest I do next, dust it? Remove the cobwebs from it? Because yes, it’s been sitting there in his damn man cave garage that long! I’ve made every kind attempt to suggesting our teamwork, I’ve spoiled him, I’ve asked sweetly, I’ve cried, I have just gotten pissed off. I’ve done it all. At this point in time, I have decided two years in shambles is enough, whereas I am ready to YouTube the hell out of everything to be done and do it myself! I need my home back! Oh, did I mention he works in construction? Yeah…
    So in short, it depends entirely on the man you married, not what you do as a wife. If your feminine whiles work, great. My husband of twenty two years, is not that man.

    1. Hello! I totally understand your frustration and appreciate your comment. First, I’ve been married for 36 years. And yes, not everything absolutely works for everyone. The Bible tells us “to be subject to our own husband” as in not every man is the same. The one thing I left out of this blog post was that the hole in my living room was there for a year maybe even more. It wasn’t like a week or month. And unfinished projects have been something I’ve lived with since marriage. However, I’ve found for the sake of my marriage and my own well-being and peace for my home it’s best to focus on the good that’s happening with him. The more I cheered, appreciated, supported, and showed thankfulness the more projects got done. Plus, choosing joy over frustration kept my marriage in tact. So, believe me sister, I completely understand your perspective.

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