The sexual allegations are flying. It’s truly heartbreaking to hear more and more horrific stories of children who were sexually abused. We’ve all heard the stories. The Peace, Love and Rock ‘N’ Roll era from the 70s told us all love is free. Do whatever you want. If it feels good ‘do it.’
Love is not free. Love paid a price.
Those who were victims as children carry something which others know nothing about. What happened was bad enough in itself, but then the shame and guilt built up over the years is the real destroyer. It’s what happens after that seems even more destructive. No matter how many times you hear “It’s wasn’t your fault” or tell yourself even, it’s hard to really, really, believe it. Oh, you know in your head it wasn’t your fault, but in your heart, deep deep inside, you can’t seem to shake this feeling of blame. Like there’s something wrong with you and you just can’t put your finger on it. Like you are never enough. Never whole. Never completely accepted. I know because #MeToo.
Childhood trauma is bad enough but as a woman sometimes unwanted and inappropriate overtures can continue. Even into adulthood there were incidences which I never gave a huge amount of thought to. Like being groped in a telephone booth. All I was doing was trying to make a phone call, and by the grace of God I got away. And there was a time as a young adult where I almost lost my job, because I didn’t return the mangers advances toward me—and I was married. That didn’t seem to matter or stop his advances. And then, one of the most terrifying times was pulling into my parking spot at my apartment building only to have two men approach my car. One on either side. I knew they had ill-intent in mind. I knew it. One tapped on my window. I wouldn’t open it. I sat in my car long enough and waited them out. Until, finally they walked away. Why hadn’t I just drove off? At the time, it didn’t seem like the right thing to do. Or perhaps I was paralyzed by the perceived danger. All I could think of was getting into the safety of my apartment.
All of us women are well aware that we need to be perpetually on guard. Vigilantly aware of our surroundings. I feel most at ease when I’m with men that I trust (e.g., my husband, my brother, my nephew, or one of my sons), it gives me a sense of calm and security. If you’re a woman, can you relate to this?
But I can’t end there.
SADLY, “episodes” which happened to me as a child were wrong and hurtful and damaging but that’s not where my story ends. And please don’t let yours end there, too.
And then, Jesus.
When Jesus came into my life everything changed. God showed me there was a better way to process what happened. Process, and use it for good—turn pain upside-down and use it to serve others. Allow God to mold you through the pain. Trust that God has a plan and he will prevail. God wins.
I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip—he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The LORD watches over you—the LORD is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The LORD will keep you from all harm—he will watch over your life; the LORD will watch over our coming and going both now and forevermore.
When we are with God we win, too!
Love paid a price and the cost was the blood of Jesus. We can have freedom no matter what has happened in our lives. We can have success and victory. We can have happy and thriving marriages.
Instead of focusing on #MeToo I’d rather focus on #FreedomInJesus.
If you agree repost this with #FreedomInJesus.
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