Friends, I am so excited to share this week’s post. Brought back by popular vote is another article written by my daughter. Her post titled Prepare For Poop: Confessions from a New Mom was LOVED. In fact, I arrived to speak at a retreat and the ladies were talking about my blog–but NOT a post written by me!–the Prepare For Poop post written by my daughter. You’re in for a treat today.
I Hate Moms by Monica Welch
I’m absolutely brilliant, and that’s why I took to the internet to superficially research the effects of stay-at-home and working moms. What I found was wonderful. The internet is such an affirming environment, and the overwhelming support us moms had for each other, I just couldn’t handle it.
The internet is such a beautiful place- a beautiful place to get your head lobbed off.
Holy moly people! Don’t do what I did. Do not go there. Keep your fingers away from the keyboard. For the sake of your sanity and mommyhood, don’t do this to yourself.
There was so much mommy hate. Serious, unbelievable, hate for mothers. And the culprits? Other moms! Like what!? Uh, I thought I had just entered some super cool club when I became a parent: Why, yes, I do have my platinum mom card. I earn points with every diaper change, and even double the points when I wake at two in the morning to a screaming, little demon baby.
I’m just going to say it, I felt so crappy after. I was overcome with those pit-sinking feelings of despair and just doubting all the decisions I had made for my life. My kid will be in therapy as an adult, because I decided to stay at home.
Okay, let’s be honest. I’ve already relegated myself to the fact that my kid will be in therapy one day because at some point in his childhood, I didn’t give him a popsicle on a scorching summer day. He apparently felt “neglected” and I “wasn’t taking care of his needs.” Hashtag, I’m so over this.
Why people, why?! Or rather, why moms? Why are we going after each other with meat cleavers?
Is there a tiny part of me that feels self-righteous and superior? “I’m doing what’s best for all children. All moms should be at home with their babies. It’s what’s best for them.” Probably. It’s because I am having to justify to myself the decisions I have made in my life. I’m trying to make myself feel better.
But then it hits me, if I’m experiencing a superiority complex over someone else, then something is wrong in me. I’m pretty sure it discusses humility in the Bible and the importance of not thinking you’re God’s gift to the world. I don’t know, that might be in there.
I need to take a step back. I’m a stay-at-home mom because that’s what was best for me and my family. If you’re going to feel depressed and frustrated because you can’t be out in the world, then get your gorgeous self out there. Go be a working mom, because that is what’s best for you and your family.
Or maybe your husband stays home and you go be the breadwinner. I’m all about equality. So good for you girl! You be the Honey that brings home the money.
Being a mom is hard. Period. Mommin’ ain’t easy. Can I get an AMEN!? So why in the world would I want to throw shade at a mom who works or stays at home? I don’t! In fact, I’m throwing my fist into the air at this very moment in solidarity with all moms. (I lied. I’m actually boiling pacifiers.)
To all my mommies out there, in whatever walk of life you chose, I support you. What you’re doing is amazing. I’m proud of you for taking care of your family in the best way you know how. You deserve trophies, not my hate.
So to wrap this all up, number one, whatever you decide, honor God first. Number two, whatever you decide, do what’s best for your family. Number three, whatever you decide, just decide to stay off the internet; the whole thing’s a hot mess.
I raise my glass: Here’s to you Mom.
Join Lucille Williams and her pastor husband, Mike, on August 26th as the key note speakers for a parenting conference hosted by University Christian Church. For details go to Lu’s speaking page. Order Lu’s book “From Me to We: A Premarital Guide for the Bride- and Groom- to- Be” today or pick a copy up wherever books are sold. Want to subscribe to Lu Says? Simple. Give us your email and get regular updates.