I had a secret fear for many years. One that I told no one. Not even my husband. This fear started after our children were born. As they grew older, my fear grew.
I feared the empty nest years. I loved and enjoyed my children with extreme delight and couldn’t imagine life being as good after they left the nest.
Then one day this fear vanished! My youngest, and only chick left at home, flew away for 10 days to visit his brother and “sister.” Those 10 days were fantastic, electrifying, and simply brilliant! My husband and I felt like we were on our honeymoon again. Not only was it amazing, but I felt like I went back to being 20!
One of my biggest fears is now gone. This experience has caused me to think about what the secret sauce is to a marriage that feels like a continual honeymoon.
7 keys to a honeymoon-marriage:
- Be nice- Sadly, too often the person we treat the worst is our spouse. We say things we would never say to our friends and harbor unrealistic expectations. Treat your spouse better than you do anyone else.
- Put them first- Consider their feelings in your decisions. Make time for them. Schedule regular date nights. Focus on their needs and how you can help support all they do. Be willing to put “you” aside to serve them.
- Words- Say, “Thank you,” “I’m sorry,” “I was wrong,” and “I love you,” often.
- Focus on the good- Focus on the things you love about your spouse. Don’t key in on the nuances that annoy you but instead keep your mind on the attributes you love about them.
- Schedule “intimacy”- Great sex is a huge key to a happy marriage. A marriage without it is like going to the ice cream parlor when you were a kid and leaving with no ice cream. Or making it on the baseball team but never being able to throw the ball. Boring.
- Laugh- Have fun! Don’t take yourself too seriously and be willing to joke. You are probably not that easy to live with and they put up with you. Find the humor in your relationship. Laugh together. Laugh at yourself.
- Work- Marriage takes work. Work on making it the best it can be everyday. Work on making “you” the best you can be.
Marriage is a gift. Marriage molds us. It brings out our best and our worst. Marriage is a chisel that God uses to create a masterpiece.
Love your husband. Love your wife. Love until your last breath. Or their last breath.
How’s your marriage? It’s never too late to turn it into a honeymoon-marriage.